With embarassing regret

With embarrassing regret

fiction
edward w pritchard

Using the blitzkrieg techniques now legendary for their destructive powers we were about to annihilate  a very small territory of Poland; for technical reasons going back to the Treaty of Vienna of 1815 still an independent Country in name only in 1939. The powers of devastation were ready to explode and annihilate the museums, artwork, buildings and a  small population now waiting on horseback with swords drawn to confront us.

As protocol officer, a redundant position in our military machine, but a remnant of more genteel times I was given task at the eleventh hour of  informing our victims that we would be one hour late in starting our belligerent activities.  It was the anniversary of the  Fuhrer's Mother's Birthday and out of respect to her we would not attack during the hour of 5PM that the Fuhrer and his dear Mother customarily ate dinner when he was a boy. Our carefully prepared battle plans and goals must accommodate the Fuhrer's  heart felt affection for his Mother's memories.

I greeted the trembling Generals of our opposition somewhat sheepishly:
"With embarrassing regret the German nation informs you that there will be a one hour delay...
end