Thursday, February 4, 2010
The Computer Who Couldn't Accept the Here and Now/ draft 2
The Computer Who Couldn't Accept the Here and Now
fiction
edward w pritchard
Case summary
cheryl evans
adjuster/Tuscan Insurance
A computer is moved from a location with 200 computers to another more remote site on a college campus by itself. Immediately after the move, the stand alone computer begins to malfunction because in its isolation the computer refuses to accept that where it is, is HERE. This leads to the computer refusing to accept that NOW is the present since NOW is in fact only NOW at the previous location with the 200 others computers. A damage claim by Missouri State University has been made to Tuscan Insurance for business interruption.
The computer in question is a model 45. Model 45's are among the highest level reasoning and functioning artificial intelligence units of the ordinary class models. The 45's are the work horse type artificial intelligence units known as competent workers and known to readily interact with humans. The two hundred other computers are at the original location at the campus in Springfield Missouri, and do recruiting and billing. The model 45 is reassigned 40 miles away in Joplin, Missouri to work at a remote site in the same duties backing up three humans in the admissions department. The Model 45 begins to botch routine assignments upon arrival. The human supervisor takes steps to fix the expensive computer [ $275,000 USD] but is unable to do so. Apparently the computer cannot accept that since he is no longer in the original place, Springfield, Missouri, HERE, cannot be HERE for both Springfield Mo, and the new location , Joplin, Mo. The computer will not accept programming modifications from supervisor that HERE is HERE for both locations, stubbornly claiming that Joplin Mo is THERE. This leads to the more serious problem that NOW cannot exist at both locations simultaneously. Model 45 is rejecting command logic based on word tense and will only accept tenseless commands. Tenseless commands are extremely complicated to program and administer and there is a potential Homeland security issue; but more importantly tenseless commands are extremely expensive to re-program since only a master programmer is allowed to work with tenseless verbs. As example; Tensed--The computer was broken. Was is tensed in that sentence. Tenseless; Winter occurs on December 21st. Occurs is tenseless in the last sentence.
METHODS
Red Withers is a psychiatrist in Artificial Intelligence and a Master Programmer. Adjuster has worked with Mr. Withers successfully previously on three occasions. Three sessions at $750 per are authorized. Policy number assigned is #7649-45-03/03/2025. The STIPS method will be used by Mr. Withers. I, Cheryl Evans to approve sessions two and three, manual notes from Mr. Withers please prior, all three sessions completed within 10 days of 03/04/2025.
CE
dictated not read
Case Notes
session 1
Dr. Red Withers/"technician"
MD psychiatry
MBP-master programmer
03/06/2025
billing code-Ins/ 30 day/ no interest till 60 days
Form/ STIPS [ per Tuscan]
Client Model 45 known as Rock
STIPS method
Signs/Symptoms
The model 45 was visually inspected and talked to by laptop 721 by yours truly. [ Julie, edit as appropriate throughout, I hope your daughter is feeling better].
The 45, Rock [ sounds like a Missouri State linebacker] is confusing locations in space, HERE and THERE. This lead to the more serious problem of confusion concerning time, NOW, and Before and After. Model 45 cannot accept tensed verbs in logic sequences causing bizarre reasoning and erratic outputs. Model 45 is basically being difficult to work with per human supervisors at Joplin, Mo location.
Human supervisor interviewed admits to shutting down Model 45 without proper backup because model 45 is "vindictive" heh dude, [ that's how the Rock is, maybe the MSU tigers should put him at linebacker after all], edit please. Improper back-up resulted in damage claim to Tuscan Insurance of $14,500. However, back-up is not considered by this Technician to be the cause of 45's issues. Problem is stress related to move and perceived isolation by Rock, causing mild delusions.
Topics:
central problems
1.
logic sequence
Space/ HERE vs THERE
Time/ NOW vs before, later
a and b series, time issues concerning -- past present future/before and after and now [see J. M. E. McTaggart of Cambridge University, circa 1905]
Is time real?
a. Why is HERE not remarkable, Here, is a location in space, Here does not require intelligent entities to exist
b. Why is NOW special, NOW requires an observer [ time cannot exist without mind or intelligence]
Interventions:
Technician requests 30 minute programming/couch analysis with Rock, concerning two topics
Space 5 minutes- Why here is sharable
Time- 25 minutes- past/present, future- assumptions must be made by computers and artificial intelligence units to conduct routine matters by humans. These assumptions concerning Time are a basic programming element in all model 45's.
Plans
Technician feels after session one Model 45 is fixable. Educate and reprogram using Model 45's internal reprogramming tools. [ Julie make sure we have the current manual] If more than two programming sessions are needed technician requests 4th session at $1000 per, [new script please]. In either case last session is verification and observation.
Special issues:
extra session to be at $1000 per session
Human dept manager claims Rock is vindictive
Technician Withers notes at the original bank of 200 computers at the Springfield Missouri site, one other 45 was scrapped a few months ago. Value 0, Jan 26, 2025, cause unknown, no sessions ordered previous, not mechanical, software logic related. Issue suggests basic programming flaws in at least two 45's. Cause unknown.
End Visit One
at Joplin, Missouri-remote campus
billing to:
Springfield Mo location
room 206
billing one hour at $750
costs-$10.25 parking, $6.90 monster energy drink
travel 87 miles
supplies-hardware part, 0432D, ground cable for Rock, Model 45 original cable appeared aged to Technician, original cable removed, scrapped [ value 0] by Technician Withers.
RW/technician
end session 1
session 2
STIPS
Red Withers
Symptoms/Signs
03/07/2025
Scheduled second visit was to be 03/09/2025. However, in the interim, Model 45 was malfunctioning badly per Ossie Tek, supervisor. We spoke by cell phone. [ 15 minutes by cell billable at $750 per please]. That day, Rock had contacted without authorization MSU home campus computer bank, and [ check this out] the Home Land Security US government field office St Louis Mo.
This technician was called on code 19 [ billing at $1000 per going forward] Technician arrived within 25 minutes, priority billing times 2. Technician proceeded to interact with Rock, the 45 by laptop.
Technician interacted via laptop for less than 5 minutes with Rock at the Joplin, Missouri location. This is where the Rock was moved to that started the problems. My laptop was unable to process the flow of consciousness from model 45. Laptop overload imminent- session stopped. Using procedure 92- 2015 I terminated the 45 known as the Rock. National Security alert initiated, detailed below.
Model 45 states:
Topics,
1. Statements about the past are not true based on the fact that the past is unreal because it does not exist in reality
2. Only present facts can make the past true, since it is not the present here in Joplin, Mo all my, the Model 45 known as The Rock to humans , programming is all false and illogical.
3. Presentism, restricting all reality to the present is the only belief possible based on a logical analysis of the world. Rock says he is a presentist.
4. The presentist must assume that only one past could be compatible with the present state of affairs? Rock has become a philosopher it seems.
5 Therefore, based on #4, the Future is unreal, Model 45 refuses to bill, perform manual back-up, perform normal duties.
I Shut down the Rock, pulled battery on laptop [ bill to MSU please]
disconnected model 45[ goodbye Rock] edit this for sure.
Intervention
technician recommends model 45 be scrapped
salvage value 0
code 35/ homeland security threat/ contact with other artificial intelligence not job related
Plans
contact Missouri State
contact Tuscan Insurance
contact Homeland security in St Louis [ Julie, I want to talk to Eric of Homeland Security by phone on this, set a telephone appointment ASAP]
end session 2
billing 2 hrs at $1000 per
15 min at $750 per
Julie compute costs as normal, same mileage as session 1
include new battery for our laptop [ let's go premium wafer style] billable to MSU
Modification to plan
Cheryl Evans BSM level 4
Tuscan Insurance, Shelby Ohio
03/20/2025
case no- 03/0631 HSA USA [ as modified] previous #7649-45-03/03/2025
re session 3
session 3 is not approved
session 2, @ $1000 times 2 is approved
technicians extraordinary costs are approved
deconstruct Model 45
scrap value 0
hardware to Eric Tinker
Homeland Security Manager Section 4
St Louis field office
Department of Homeland Security
overview memo,
St Louis Mo, field office, room 22, third floor, cubicle 11
case 2025/03/Mo/1, A
eric tinker
special agent
A model 45 was sent to a psychiatrist for adjustment and reprogram. Deemed unfit to modify. Destroyed
National security 4 [ of 10]. No human life threatened, economic damage only.
Cause:
human error 90%- supervisor at Joplin Mo, performed improper shutdown of a model 45
Computer - 10%- isolation caused loneliness [ when we first become alone we have to deal with our existential angst]. Computer model 45 could not handle being reassigned and moved.
incidental- technician [Red Withers} replaced ground cord to the model 45 with an outdated part 0432D, correct ground cord should be 0432E.
no reprimand to Withers/ strike this incidental from the record in 1 year
final report
technician Red Withers
report not billable
Service model 45, an artificial intelligence unit for Tuscan insurance at Missouri State University was scrapped value 0. Deconstructed, All parts destroyed
The model 45 was having delusions related to presentism. The 45 was restricting it's thoughts to the present only causing an inability to bill which is the 45's primary job duty.
Because of the denial of reality of the future and the 45's unable to make low level casual connections about the past, model 45 unable to do any productive work.
end
Julie clean this up please, edit brilliantly as usual and make the report shine for Tuscan Insurance.
Julie: Please,
1 Send, by US mail first class, a birding book to Cheryl at Tuscan Insurance , yes she is a birdwatcher, ie. robins and larks. Include a standard thank you. I want to hand-write a note in the book cover, and use a premium hallmark card as well.
2. Call Eric at homeland security for me: tell him I will talk to him at the game, you tell him for me for now:
Yes bro, i would love to go to the Missouri state game , old coach Pinkel WILL get the national championship again. Will your nephew start at left guard for MSU tigers?
We can take the Ford if you want, the tank is running again. I even got the tailgate fixed. I will bring a keg of Coors and brats for me. Lettuce leaves and acorns for you. Thanks old team-mate for watching my back on that ground cord issue, My bad.
3. Julie, send me one note per month on the 1st of the next three months.
RED, DO Not DO hardware fixes [ we dodged a bullet there] Julie, please watch me on this going forward
4
Good bye Rock, I know how you feel sometimes, life ain't easy for us retired MSU linebackers
Julie
put this in personal file only.
I note that the original programmer of all model 45s was a philosophy undergrad at Cambridge in England,
programmer sites, page 784 in Model 45 Programmers Manual vol 2, 2019
that he, the original programmer for all 45 computers used as a reference:
Robin Le Poidven- "Travel in Four Dimensions"- as reference concerning Time [ as does edward w pritchard your author in the story]
and
John McTaggart -"Proof of the Reality of Time", as a reference[ [ as does EWP ]
However I didn't mention the above to homeland security or Tuscan Insurance. It seems that the model 45's may have been exposed unintintually to philosophy, in particular the Philosophy of Time and Space. Exposure to philosophy by artificial units is frowned on for it disrupts one's ability to perform useful work.
but I didn't mention it in my reports,
for:
like my old Granddad the Tennessee lawyer used to say,
if it ain't billable, it may be interesting but it ain't important.
Red Withers
Psychiatrist,
computer programmer extraordinaire
end
fiction
edward w pritchard
Case summary
cheryl evans
adjuster/Tuscan Insurance
A computer is moved from a location with 200 computers to another more remote site on a college campus by itself. Immediately after the move, the stand alone computer begins to malfunction because in its isolation the computer refuses to accept that where it is, is HERE. This leads to the computer refusing to accept that NOW is the present since NOW is in fact only NOW at the previous location with the 200 others computers. A damage claim by Missouri State University has been made to Tuscan Insurance for business interruption.
The computer in question is a model 45. Model 45's are among the highest level reasoning and functioning artificial intelligence units of the ordinary class models. The 45's are the work horse type artificial intelligence units known as competent workers and known to readily interact with humans. The two hundred other computers are at the original location at the campus in Springfield Missouri, and do recruiting and billing. The model 45 is reassigned 40 miles away in Joplin, Missouri to work at a remote site in the same duties backing up three humans in the admissions department. The Model 45 begins to botch routine assignments upon arrival. The human supervisor takes steps to fix the expensive computer [ $275,000 USD] but is unable to do so. Apparently the computer cannot accept that since he is no longer in the original place, Springfield, Missouri, HERE, cannot be HERE for both Springfield Mo, and the new location , Joplin, Mo. The computer will not accept programming modifications from supervisor that HERE is HERE for both locations, stubbornly claiming that Joplin Mo is THERE. This leads to the more serious problem that NOW cannot exist at both locations simultaneously. Model 45 is rejecting command logic based on word tense and will only accept tenseless commands. Tenseless commands are extremely complicated to program and administer and there is a potential Homeland security issue; but more importantly tenseless commands are extremely expensive to re-program since only a master programmer is allowed to work with tenseless verbs. As example; Tensed--The computer was broken. Was is tensed in that sentence. Tenseless; Winter occurs on December 21st. Occurs is tenseless in the last sentence.
METHODS
Red Withers is a psychiatrist in Artificial Intelligence and a Master Programmer. Adjuster has worked with Mr. Withers successfully previously on three occasions. Three sessions at $750 per are authorized. Policy number assigned is #7649-45-03/03/2025. The STIPS method will be used by Mr. Withers. I, Cheryl Evans to approve sessions two and three, manual notes from Mr. Withers please prior, all three sessions completed within 10 days of 03/04/2025.
CE
dictated not read
Case Notes
session 1
Dr. Red Withers/"technician"
MD psychiatry
MBP-master programmer
03/06/2025
billing code-Ins/ 30 day/ no interest till 60 days
Form/ STIPS [ per Tuscan]
Client Model 45 known as Rock
STIPS method
Signs/Symptoms
The model 45 was visually inspected and talked to by laptop 721 by yours truly. [ Julie, edit as appropriate throughout, I hope your daughter is feeling better].
The 45, Rock [ sounds like a Missouri State linebacker] is confusing locations in space, HERE and THERE. This lead to the more serious problem of confusion concerning time, NOW, and Before and After. Model 45 cannot accept tensed verbs in logic sequences causing bizarre reasoning and erratic outputs. Model 45 is basically being difficult to work with per human supervisors at Joplin, Mo location.
Human supervisor interviewed admits to shutting down Model 45 without proper backup because model 45 is "vindictive" heh dude, [ that's how the Rock is, maybe the MSU tigers should put him at linebacker after all], edit please. Improper back-up resulted in damage claim to Tuscan Insurance of $14,500. However, back-up is not considered by this Technician to be the cause of 45's issues. Problem is stress related to move and perceived isolation by Rock, causing mild delusions.
Topics:
central problems
1.
logic sequence
Space/ HERE vs THERE
Time/ NOW vs before, later
a and b series, time issues concerning -- past present future/before and after and now [see J. M. E. McTaggart of Cambridge University, circa 1905]
Is time real?
a. Why is HERE not remarkable, Here, is a location in space, Here does not require intelligent entities to exist
b. Why is NOW special, NOW requires an observer [ time cannot exist without mind or intelligence]
Interventions:
Technician requests 30 minute programming/couch analysis with Rock, concerning two topics
Space 5 minutes- Why here is sharable
Time- 25 minutes- past/present, future- assumptions must be made by computers and artificial intelligence units to conduct routine matters by humans. These assumptions concerning Time are a basic programming element in all model 45's.
Plans
Technician feels after session one Model 45 is fixable. Educate and reprogram using Model 45's internal reprogramming tools. [ Julie make sure we have the current manual] If more than two programming sessions are needed technician requests 4th session at $1000 per, [new script please]. In either case last session is verification and observation.
Special issues:
extra session to be at $1000 per session
Human dept manager claims Rock is vindictive
Technician Withers notes at the original bank of 200 computers at the Springfield Missouri site, one other 45 was scrapped a few months ago. Value 0, Jan 26, 2025, cause unknown, no sessions ordered previous, not mechanical, software logic related. Issue suggests basic programming flaws in at least two 45's. Cause unknown.
End Visit One
at Joplin, Missouri-remote campus
billing to:
Springfield Mo location
room 206
billing one hour at $750
costs-$10.25 parking, $6.90 monster energy drink
travel 87 miles
supplies-hardware part, 0432D, ground cable for Rock, Model 45 original cable appeared aged to Technician, original cable removed, scrapped [ value 0] by Technician Withers.
RW/technician
end session 1
session 2
STIPS
Red Withers
Symptoms/Signs
03/07/2025
Scheduled second visit was to be 03/09/2025. However, in the interim, Model 45 was malfunctioning badly per Ossie Tek, supervisor. We spoke by cell phone. [ 15 minutes by cell billable at $750 per please]. That day, Rock had contacted without authorization MSU home campus computer bank, and [ check this out] the Home Land Security US government field office St Louis Mo.
This technician was called on code 19 [ billing at $1000 per going forward] Technician arrived within 25 minutes, priority billing times 2. Technician proceeded to interact with Rock, the 45 by laptop.
Technician interacted via laptop for less than 5 minutes with Rock at the Joplin, Missouri location. This is where the Rock was moved to that started the problems. My laptop was unable to process the flow of consciousness from model 45. Laptop overload imminent- session stopped. Using procedure 92- 2015 I terminated the 45 known as the Rock. National Security alert initiated, detailed below.
Model 45 states:
Topics,
1. Statements about the past are not true based on the fact that the past is unreal because it does not exist in reality
2. Only present facts can make the past true, since it is not the present here in Joplin, Mo all my, the Model 45 known as The Rock to humans , programming is all false and illogical.
3. Presentism, restricting all reality to the present is the only belief possible based on a logical analysis of the world. Rock says he is a presentist.
4. The presentist must assume that only one past could be compatible with the present state of affairs? Rock has become a philosopher it seems.
5 Therefore, based on #4, the Future is unreal, Model 45 refuses to bill, perform manual back-up, perform normal duties.
I Shut down the Rock, pulled battery on laptop [ bill to MSU please]
disconnected model 45[ goodbye Rock] edit this for sure.
Intervention
technician recommends model 45 be scrapped
salvage value 0
code 35/ homeland security threat/ contact with other artificial intelligence not job related
Plans
contact Missouri State
contact Tuscan Insurance
contact Homeland security in St Louis [ Julie, I want to talk to Eric of Homeland Security by phone on this, set a telephone appointment ASAP]
end session 2
billing 2 hrs at $1000 per
15 min at $750 per
Julie compute costs as normal, same mileage as session 1
include new battery for our laptop [ let's go premium wafer style] billable to MSU
Modification to plan
Cheryl Evans BSM level 4
Tuscan Insurance, Shelby Ohio
03/20/2025
case no- 03/0631 HSA USA [ as modified] previous #7649-45-03/03/2025
re session 3
session 3 is not approved
session 2, @ $1000 times 2 is approved
technicians extraordinary costs are approved
deconstruct Model 45
scrap value 0
hardware to Eric Tinker
Homeland Security Manager Section 4
St Louis field office
Department of Homeland Security
overview memo,
St Louis Mo, field office, room 22, third floor, cubicle 11
case 2025/03/Mo/1, A
eric tinker
special agent
A model 45 was sent to a psychiatrist for adjustment and reprogram. Deemed unfit to modify. Destroyed
National security 4 [ of 10]. No human life threatened, economic damage only.
Cause:
human error 90%- supervisor at Joplin Mo, performed improper shutdown of a model 45
Computer - 10%- isolation caused loneliness [ when we first become alone we have to deal with our existential angst]. Computer model 45 could not handle being reassigned and moved.
incidental- technician [Red Withers} replaced ground cord to the model 45 with an outdated part 0432D, correct ground cord should be 0432E.
no reprimand to Withers/ strike this incidental from the record in 1 year
final report
technician Red Withers
report not billable
Service model 45, an artificial intelligence unit for Tuscan insurance at Missouri State University was scrapped value 0. Deconstructed, All parts destroyed
The model 45 was having delusions related to presentism. The 45 was restricting it's thoughts to the present only causing an inability to bill which is the 45's primary job duty.
Because of the denial of reality of the future and the 45's unable to make low level casual connections about the past, model 45 unable to do any productive work.
end
Julie clean this up please, edit brilliantly as usual and make the report shine for Tuscan Insurance.
Julie: Please,
1 Send, by US mail first class, a birding book to Cheryl at Tuscan Insurance , yes she is a birdwatcher, ie. robins and larks. Include a standard thank you. I want to hand-write a note in the book cover, and use a premium hallmark card as well.
2. Call Eric at homeland security for me: tell him I will talk to him at the game, you tell him for me for now:
Yes bro, i would love to go to the Missouri state game , old coach Pinkel WILL get the national championship again. Will your nephew start at left guard for MSU tigers?
We can take the Ford if you want, the tank is running again. I even got the tailgate fixed. I will bring a keg of Coors and brats for me. Lettuce leaves and acorns for you. Thanks old team-mate for watching my back on that ground cord issue, My bad.
3. Julie, send me one note per month on the 1st of the next three months.
RED, DO Not DO hardware fixes [ we dodged a bullet there] Julie, please watch me on this going forward
4
Good bye Rock, I know how you feel sometimes, life ain't easy for us retired MSU linebackers
Julie
put this in personal file only.
I note that the original programmer of all model 45s was a philosophy undergrad at Cambridge in England,
programmer sites, page 784 in Model 45 Programmers Manual vol 2, 2019
that he, the original programmer for all 45 computers used as a reference:
Robin Le Poidven- "Travel in Four Dimensions"- as reference concerning Time [ as does edward w pritchard your author in the story]
and
John McTaggart -"Proof of the Reality of Time", as a reference[ [ as does EWP ]
However I didn't mention the above to homeland security or Tuscan Insurance. It seems that the model 45's may have been exposed unintintually to philosophy, in particular the Philosophy of Time and Space. Exposure to philosophy by artificial units is frowned on for it disrupts one's ability to perform useful work.
but I didn't mention it in my reports,
for:
like my old Granddad the Tennessee lawyer used to say,
if it ain't billable, it may be interesting but it ain't important.
Red Withers
Psychiatrist,
computer programmer extraordinaire
end
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